In his book "Attitude" Coach Wright wrote about a key element needed for happiness:
 
"Failure Isn't Forever. Never fear failure. Think of it as an opportunity to learn. If you can approach every challenge without a fear of failure, knowing that you'll learn from any setback, you will find it easier to work with a free and uncluttered mind."
 
On March 20, 2016, on their way to the first of two National Championships, as Villanova prepared to face Iowa in the second game of the first round of the NCAA Tournament the pressure was on. The previous year they had been upset as a number one seed in the same situation. Coach Wright got rid of any fear of failure with great direct honest communication that put things in perspective. He described the moment this way:
 
"All year we had looked forward to this moment. Now it was here, and we felt unshackled. We weren't afraid of what came next. I rhetorically asked the guys: "What is the worst thing that could happen if we lost? Could we handle it if we did?" We already knew we could because we had done it." With free and uncluttered minds Villanova beat Iowa 87-68.
 
Here are four great thoughts from Coach Wooden that can help eliminate fear of failure:
 
"The people who don't make mistakes are the people that don't do anything."
 
"A mistake is valuable if you do four things with it: recognize it, admit it, learn from it, forget it."
 
"Don't permit fear of failure to prevent effort. We are all imperfect and will fail on occasions, but fear of failure is the greatest failure of all."
 
"The person who is afraid to risk failure seldom has to face success. The only real failure is the failure to act when action is required."
 
Instagram and Facebook have tremendous social benefits, but they have also created a whole new level of fear of failure for some folks. Some people fear they are a failure if they don't measure up to the idyllic images and profiles of friends and/or celebrities. Social media for them creates fear instead of fun. It is helpful to remember: The root of much unhappiness is comparison and don't forget to: Appreciate your own lawn.
 
Coach Wooden's basic approach of: "Never try to be better than someone else. But always be learning from others. Never cease trying to be the best you can be. One is under your control the other isn't." can help young people use social media as resource for fun and learning not failure and fear. The goal is to satisfy not everyone else's expectations, but your own.
 
What mental approach are you taking and teaching your team members to deal with fear of failure and social media?

​Whether you are recruiting for a sports team or interviewing a potential employee; you do that person, your team and yourself a tremendous disservice if you fall into the trap of painting too rosy a picture in hopes of enticing that person to choose your team. Villanova's Jay Wright gives potential members of his team a clear picture of what will be expected of them. In his terrific book "Attitude"  Coach Wright discusses his approach:
 
"In our recruiting, we don't spend a lot of time talking about basketball. Instead, we spend the vast majority of our time talking about all of the other things the Villanova experience has to offer. We make it very clear we want people who want to be more than just great basketball players.
 
Our philosophy: Be the best student you can be. Be the best man you can be. Be the best player you can be. We believe your commitment to excellence as a man and a student enhances your ability to reach your full potential on the basketball court.
 
One of the themes we reference often in our program is the story of "The Street Sweeper." It comes from a 1967 speech in Philadelphia by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.:
 
"If it falls to your lot to be a street sweeper, sweep streets like Michelangelo painted pictures, sweep streets like Beethoven composed music, sweep streets like Leontyne Price sings before the Metropolitan Opera. Sweep streets like Shakespeare wrote poetry. Sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will have to pause and say, 'Here lived a great street sweeperwho swept his job well.'"
 
Team Chaplin Father Rob Hagan reinforces the idea that "you must take the initiative to improve on your own and not wait on others to show you what to do" with this story:
 
"There is a poor woman who sits at the table every night, praying she wins the lottery," There are bills to pay and she arises each morning and prays, 'Dear God, I have to pay my children's tuition. Help me win the lottery.' She arises the next morning and prays, 'Dear God, I've got to make my car payment. Help me win the lottery.' "She arises the next morning and prays, 'Dear God, I've got to pay my mortgage. Help me win the lottery.' "The next morning she arises and prays, 'Dear God—' and before she can finish, God interrupts her and says, 'Work with me here: You have to buy a ticket!'"
 
It's good to ask God for help," Father Rob explains, "but we also ought to be willing to put forth the effort each day.
 
In the words of Saint Augustine: "Do not be content with what you are if you want to become what you are not yet. Where you have grown pleased with yourself, there you shall remain. Keep pushing forward.'"
 
Coach Wright can demand excellence from his players without creating resentment because he gives them clear expectations before they join the team.
 
What expectations do you communicate?

On March 24th, 2016, Jay Wright's Villanova faced the University of Miami in the first round of the sweet sixteen in Louisville, Kentucky on their way to the first of its two National Championships.
 
As is the normal procedure that afternoon at the pre-game meal, Team Chaplin Father Rob Hagan shared a Life Lesson with the team. Father Rob's messages are based in Christianity and the Bible, but all members of the team, irrespective of their religion, know how universal his reflections are.
 
It was Holy Thursday and Father Rob began by telling the team how Jesus at his last "Team Meal" on this same day had taken the opportunity to solidify what it means to truly live for others when He washed the feet of his Apostles in an act of humble service. Jesus said, 'Humility is not weakness. It is strength.'
 
In Coach Wright's book, "Attitude" he describes what Father Hagan said and did next:
 
"Brothers, maybe we could join in that spirit and simply pull off a sneaker and a sock and use these pitchers of water on the table to wash the foot of the person next to us. A coach, a teammate, a manager, a trainer, a spouse. Father Rob walked to the table, grabbed a full pitcher and walked in my direction. I pulled a shoe and sock off and rolled up the pant leg of my Nike sweat suit. Father Rob took the pitcher and began to pour. Father Rob had washed my foot. Ryan "Arch" Arcidiacono was seated next to me. I looked at him, and without a word, he took off a shoe and sock. I grabbed another pitcher to wash Arch's foot. And so, it went, from one player to the next, on to the coaching and administrative staff. The room was silent the entire time. As each player passed the pitcher to the next, it felt to me like we were growing incrementally stronger with each pouring.
 
Father Rob put the lesson in terms that everyone could relate to. "So much of our lives is measured in numbers," he continued. "Number of points, number of minutes, number of highlights on SportsCenter. Number of dollars. Jesus is challenging us to track some new numbers: The number of times I picked someone else up who was down. The number of times I sacrificed a piece of me for someone else. The number of times I asked for and offered forgiveness."
 
Father Rob had given the team the most important statistics to track.
 
What's on your stat sheet?